Sunday, November 1, 2009

are we there yet?

sometimes i feel like i'm in the bottom of this deep, dark hole... and i'm looking up, squinting, and i can only BARELY see the light at the top. Proof theres a way out... but, still a long ways away... and i can't help but think... "I'll never make it..."

i'll start to climb... bruises, scrapes, dirt, sweat, tears... i get tired, and the weight i'm hauling gets so heavy i think i'll fall, and it makes my entire body, clear down to my heart, ache... and i look around me after what seems like a lifetime of crawling up the side of this dirty, wet, and lonely hole... and everything looks the same, and i am sure i have gotten nowhere. Sometimes, someone will walk by... and toss down a word of encouragement, and maybe even a rope to help... but before i ever get even CLOSE to the top... to my escape... they are called away, or have their own life to live... but even still, they realistically can't pull me ALL the way... i have to make it on my own...

i cry... i panic... i try to catch my breath... and i keep going... and i know that eventually, inch my inch... minute by minute... i'll get there... out to the fresh air, where i can breath again, and feel the warmth of the sun...

and every now and then i'll look up and see the sky... and i'll gain strength from it to keep going awhile longer... but then i get weak, and lonely... and i'll lose a little hope when i look up, and the end still seems so far away...

i just so desperately want to get out of this hole...

well1

*just needed to vent...