i'm in the most bitter mood EVER. Woke up to a text from Justin letting me know that he won't be able to stay long enough to be home from Easter. I'm very disappointed... Easter is a huge Holiday for my family, and i'm just sick and tired of going to special family gatherings alone, and of justin missing out on such precious moments in nathaniel's life. This will be his 2nd Easter away from us... also the 2nd Mother's Day. Then, as i laid in bed fuming about the fact he won't even be home a full 2 weeks (only 11 days) i realized that in June, we'll have only been together 11 days out of that last year. and only 21 days out of that last 15 months. it's not ok... he's missed EVERY SINGLE holiday and special day... and like i said, some holidays twice. it's NOT ok that he's missed Nathaniel hunting for Easter eggs two years in a row, that he's missed Christmas, and our Ann. it's NOT OK.
and then... it happened. It always happens. and i think it happens to every military family. The inevitable future goodbye's haunting.
Justin's not even home, and i'm already thinking of the next time we'll have to say goodbye. The next "last night" together. The next time i have to drive him to the airport. The next time i'll have to watch him walk away from me. I hate that... but i can't help it. It's inevitable. It's that thought thats in the back of your head his entire time home saying... "You only have 11 days with him...", "You only have another week with him...", "You only have 3 more days with him...", "You have to say goodbye again tomorrow...". I mean, you BARELY get used to being with them again, sharing responsibilities, and having them there to talk to... and you're turning around to say goodbye again! what must it do to Nathaniel's little heart and mind? i mean, it TEARS ME UP... but at least i understand why... poor nathaniel doesn't understand at all. The only comfort i can take in this goodbye is that it is the last... no more on the horizon, at least for now. Also, we'll be able to talk on the phone just about any time we want... for however long we want... about anything we want...
it's comforting... but it certainly doesn't make it any easier to swallow those numbers... 11 days in a year...
11 days is just not enough...
About Me
- Anna Mae
- Oskaloosa, Iowa, United States
- Hello! I'm Anna, and this is my little corner of the internet. Here is where I hope to share my general life experience. I'll have a bit of everything. Stuff about parenting, pregnancy, politics, photography, TV/Movies/Books, God, Marriage... So take a second to enjoy. Thanks for stopping by!
Family Picture
The Schaefer Family
"Love knows not it's own power. until the darkest hour of separation"
"Absence is to love what wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small, it kindles the great."- Rabutin"
To try to write love is to confront the muck of language: that region of hysteria where language is both too much and too little, excessive and impoverished."- Roland Barthes
“Of all the rights of women, the greatest is to be a mother.” - Lin Yutang
"You have so many extraordinary gifts, how can you expect to lead an ordinary life?"-Little Women
"I never knew how to worship, until i knew how to love"- Henry Ward Beecher
"Absence is to love what wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small, it kindles the great."- Rabutin"
To try to write love is to confront the muck of language: that region of hysteria where language is both too much and too little, excessive and impoverished."- Roland Barthes
“Of all the rights of women, the greatest is to be a mother.” - Lin Yutang
"You have so many extraordinary gifts, how can you expect to lead an ordinary life?"-Little Women
"I never knew how to worship, until i knew how to love"- Henry Ward Beecher
My beautiful kiddos
"Women wished to be loved not because they are pretty, or good, or well bred, or graceful, or intelligent, but because they are themselves.- Henri Frederic Amiel
“There is no way to be a perfect mother, and a million ways to be a good one” - Jill Churchill
“There is no way to be a perfect mother, and a million ways to be a good one” - Jill Churchill
My husband & I
“To describe my mother would be to write about a hurricane in its perfect power.” - Maya Angelou
"Sometimes we love someone so much we have to be numb to it... because if we actually felt how much we loved them... it'd kill us." -Riding In Cars With Boys
“The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new.” - Rajneesh
"Sometimes we love someone so much we have to be numb to it... because if we actually felt how much we loved them... it'd kill us." -Riding In Cars With Boys
“The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new.” - Rajneesh
family
Psalm 51:10-12
Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.
Psalm 27:1-3
The Lord is my light and my salvation-
whom shall i fear?
The Lord is the stronghold of my life-
of whom shall i be afraid?
When evil men advance against me
to devour my flesh,
When my enemies and my foes attack me,
they will stumble and fall.
Though an army besiege me,
my heart will not fear;
though war break out against me,
even then will i be confident.
whom shall i fear?
The Lord is the stronghold of my life-
of whom shall i be afraid?
When evil men advance against me
to devour my flesh,
When my enemies and my foes attack me,
they will stumble and fall.
Though an army besiege me,
my heart will not fear;
though war break out against me,
even then will i be confident.
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