let the rush begin!

oh my gosh... i am home and in full swing BUSY! :S I ended up missing my 6am flight, and had to wait around the airport for about 5 1/2 hours for another flight! :( UGH! But Nathaniel was a champ! and Justin was amazing as he worked to get me on another flight. :) I sure did marry a SuperMan! :)

Got into Iowa on Friday night and have had 2 Thanksgivings already, church, family time with justn's mom, a Maple Ridge church service, lots of leftover turkey sandwhiches, and hot chocolate at Smokey Row ALREADY! wow...

It snowed last night and all today though... :) i've loved it! though most everyone HERE wants me to take the snow to VA with me when i go back! ;) I certainly wouldn't mind! It would make everything feel a whole more like Christmas as well as get Justin out of work! ;)

but i hope to get a few more blog in while i'm here... maybe a few more that may be more poetic. :) God Bless!

3 days and counting!

well, not counting today (because it's almost over- 4pm) and not counting Friday (since i get there at 10am... early for me ;) we have 3 days til i fly home!

i am WAY excited! more excited i think than any other time... i think because of the season i get to go home during! i still feel really bad for justin... but i've had multiple friends from church tell me they'll have him over, and then he's spending lots of LONG DAYS on the ship... days where at the end, he just wants to come home and sleep... which i don't really let him do cuz i'm needy like that... and want MY time with him. :P lol But he's looking forward to the "guilt-free sleep" :) and i guess i'm looking forward to a little of that kind of time too... i'm hoping to be able to do some things while home and take advantage of the grandmas being there to babysit! :)

but yeah... i have a really full week! justin's gone all day today... most likely until 10pm (and he took the truck, which has the carseat base in it... so i can't run to wal mart like i wanted.), tomorrow i need to make a last run to WalMart before Thanksgiving and the trip home, and maybe take nathaniel to get checked out at the Doctor's... he's had a stuffy nose for over a week! :( poor baby. Then wednesday i'm throwing together most of the food i have to make for our dinner on Thanksgiving... cheesy potatoes, scalloped corn, veggies, rolls, green beans, butterfinger pizza, and a pie... i think thats all. :S along with getting all that ready to go, i need to get most of nathaniel and i's things ready and packed for our trip home, as THURSDAY i do not want to be running around like a chicken with my head cut off! i want to relax, watch the Thanksgiving Day Parade with my hubby and son, and enjoy finishing up the cooking and the dinner with friends. We have to be up and moving by 3:30am at the latest! out Flight takes off at 6am, so we have to check in by 5am, so have to leave the apartment by 4:30am at the latest! UGH!!!!!! i will be DEAD! then as soon as i get home i have a Thanksgiving that night with my dad's side of the family!

long week!!!!!!!! but i'm excited! i like being busy with family and friends! :) and i can't wait to be home for all the things leading up to Christmas... Family get-togethers for Thanksgiving, the home-town Christmas Parade, my grandma's church's women's Christmas thing, Advent, Maple Ridge's Christmas Party, and i hope SNOW!!! :)

MY HUSBAND ROCKS MY SOCKS OFF!

ok, so this week... my hubby totally rocked and made me SO PROUD! :)
He had duty on tuesday... which means he had to go to work at about 6am but wouldn't be back until about 5pm the NEXT NIGHT! :( so on wednesday, i get a text saying to be ready to go out that night. I was all excited... any time we get out of the house is exciting to me! ;) So i asked him where we were going, and he wouldn't tell me... just to wear jeans and a nice shirt. Ok, whatev. So he gets home, i'm showered and about ready... we load up Nathaniel and leave. He drives to RedLobster... hmmmm, this is good. So we go in and order and such and are about 1/2 way through our meal when he smiles and asks, "Don't you have any idea WHY we went out tonight?" Honestly, i thought he'd just wanted to be sweet for me... and DID NOT question it! lol I just went along with it and enjoyed! So i think... ok, what's the date. No wedding ann, no significance at all... so i ask, "Did something happen on this date?" "Yeeeeeeeesssssss..." was all he said... i sat and thought and thought. NOTHING CAME TO MIND! so he bagan... "On November 19th... two-thousand... and eight... you became... MRS... AO3 Schaefer!"

for all you civilians ;) this means he passed his big test and got promoted to 3rd Class Petty Officer, a pretty good pay-raise, and a great acheivement! I was SOOO excited for him!!!! :D and he was SO PROUD! he was grinning from ear to ear! I LOVED seeing him like that!

Also... he's taking me on a date to the movie Twilight tonight... and i'm pretty dang excited! :)

might start a little something new...

[sometimes i get in the mood where i just want to write, for the sake of writing... just to feel the keys under my fingers, just a little time to let my imagination go wild, a time to light my candles, put on my music, and write... maybe write some deeps thoughts that lead to nowhere, or maybe... i'll start writing some of my wonderings... the stories that go through my head when i listen to my songs. So... you don't have to read, but i'm gonna write what i see when i listen to my favorite songs that inspire me... so, here i go.]

The fall wind weaved itself through her auborn hair... twisting and twirling it into a frizzy do. The sun was setting, casting the last bit of warmth her way... a grin crept across her lips as she took a deep breath. She drove her big, rusty-red truck down the road, headed nowhere in particular. Her music played, a simple tune, about a boy, with guitar gently strumming behind soft drums and the singer's smooth voice. The song lifted into the wind, trailing behind the car, in the same rhythm... light and deep with emotion. She pulled over to the side of the road, next to a field of tall grass. It was the color of light sand... a beach out in the middle of her country. She sat, letting the song bring memories into her mind... pictures of smiles and innocent touches fill her. The warmth in her heart overflowed to make her grin into a full smile. She got out of her truck, feeling the warmth of the setting sun on her cheeks as she walked out into the field... drifting her fingers over the tops of the prickly grass.

He was wonderful... They'd parked right here 3 years ago to stargaze... his arm had draped over her shoulders, and she'd laid her head on him while laying in his truck bed. She could still smell him... nothing special, just the smell of his skin and his laundry detergent... but HIS smell, none-the-less. Now, she looked up into the blue sky as it darkened in shade... it was the color of his eyes... she searched it, the same way she'd searched his that night... searching for anything that might promise her forever. She'd prayed... in the moment he caught her looking at him and locked eyes. What she'd prayed, she couldn't pinpoint... it was as if everything spilled out in that one millisecond. all her fears, her wants, her needs, her dreams, her insecurities... had he read every one of those private thoughts in her eyes that night? He had to have... he'd known her better than anyone from that moment on... always fragile and vulnerable under his watch... as he cherished her.

She raised her arms above her head, seemingly to embrace the sky... the wind whipped around her, wrapping her in a warm embrace... and through time and distance... she knew he was thinking of her too. And she took comfort in that moment... as she stood hugging the sky, listening to her sweet song of magic from her truck radio... that he was thinking of her too for even one second... thats all she needed.

She took one more breath and dropped her arms around her. She turned and walked back to her truck as the song ended. She got in, closed the door, and drove away from her field. And a thousand miles away, he stood, frozen in the middle of his small apartment, in the middle of a cold and busy city that did not know him... feeling his heart stir at the thought of a girl who'd known him and loved him... and he felt her magic.

The Thing About Marriage...

You have people tell you over and OVER before you actually take that first step down the aisle "Marriage is hard sometimes..." or "Marriage is a lot of work..." but for some reason, we don't seem to register that fact. We may think "well, maybe it's work for YOU! but it won't be that hard for me!" and then when a day dawns where you're not feeling only warm and lovely feelings toward your spouse we seem blindsided and shocked! and we scramble through our memories for that moment where we lost that constant grin and anticipation and young feeling! WHAT WENT WRONG? WHAT DO I DO NOW????

a kiss is just a fleeting thought before leaving the house, and may go completely overlooked once they return... while when we first got together, EVERY kiss was a thrill and looked for and did things to our heart and body that had us earning for the next chance for our lips to meet... while NOW, we MIGHT get that feeling once a week... if we're lucky. Suddenly your spouse may not feel as interesting or mysterious as before, or as sweet or attentive. We may try to talk to him, maybe try to open some locked treasure of something we DIDN'T KNOW before... something new to learn... something so spark some new interest! but... maybe the things you learn weren't what you had in mind and only make you wonder... "did i know this man before i married him?" Not that you regret it at all... you still love him and can't imagine being with anyone else... you know he loves you too, he's provided for you, is faithful to you, and maybe has given you children. but... isn't there more than that? can't we get back to the beginning????

no, i suppose not... then how do we make love deep again? WE can read all the books we want... but what if nothing on their end changes? what if after WE try to fix our thinking, we still can't change the fact that sometimes... our feelings may not change.

This was just thinking... nothing to worry about justin and i... we are no worse off than any other couple learning that marriage indeed IS work... We are still in love, we are not fighting constantly, and we are continuing to pray for one another. :) we just had a heart-to-heart talk last night that got me thinking.

i am sooooooooooooo bored...

and excited! :) i feel extremely selfish though, being this excited about going home even when justin will be stuck on the ship and here alone. But i am seriously PUMPED! first off, we're totally surprising my grandpa and maybe my Mother in Law! AND maybe my best friend! lol I fly in at about 10am on Nov. 28th and then i have my VanZomeren side Thanksgiving that night, but before that i think i'll drive up and surprise my Mother in Law! :) i HOPE she doesn't already know... but we'll see. Then Sat. night my mom's side of the family is having their Thanksgiving get-together... and thats when i think we'll surprise my grandpa. HE WILL TOTALLY FREAK OUT! :D lol He is so depressed thinking that he won't see us til March, when nathaniel is a year old... and he's so obsessed with his great grandkids... he's even put a swing up in the middle of their living room, hanging it from the ceiling! lol So our plan is to while my grandpa is in his shop or in the basement, i'll come in and put nathaniel in the swing, and then i'll hide... and grandpa will see nathaniel in the swing and i'll come out and be like "SURPRISE!!!!!" HAHAHAHAHA!!!! cannot wait! Then i'm also gonna try to surprise my Mom in Law... just by walking into the house and being like "just wanted to stop by!" :D lol Then as far as my best friend knows i'm flying BACK to VA on Nov. 13th... the same day SHE is flying INTO iowa! LOL so i'm thinking i'm gonna try to go with whoever is picking her up or drive up and surprise HER too!!!! Cuz she's been begging me to extend my stay but i keep telling her it's just too expensive. YAY! i LOOOOOOOOOOVE surprisig people!

and along with all that, i get to go to BOTH of my family's Thanksgiving Get-Togethers, and Oskaloosa's Lighted Christmas Parade, AND my grandpa's birthday! :)

i can't help but feel bad for justin though... i feel so bad for him. He doesn't seem bothered with it though... he says he wants "guilt-free sleep" and time to himself before he's stuck on a ship. And he's never been as close to his family as i am to mine... not NEAR as close. Family is truly #2 to me (#1 is God) and to him... he's dived into the whole independent from family thing... his family is just really different than mine. It seems that once they graduate, they are on their own, free and encouraged to live their own lives apart from "home"... while me, i can never picture a life without my family right down the road... which to some, that seems like we haven't "cut the cord" or that i've been to sheltered in my life... but, i WANT my family in my back pocket... i WANT my family in all my business! My family is my foundation... they are the ones that lead me in my walk with Christ until i could walk on my own... they are the ones who stood by me and prayed for me when i was broken... and they are the ones that still soak in all the joy that is also in my life... my joy is their joy... my pain and frustration is theirs... and i love that. While when i look at justin... it just seems like he's just out there all on his own, except for me at his side... it's SO different from my family. But i desperately want to become more a part of their family... and i kinda hope that i can bring a little of the magic in MY family into theirs... It's gonna be an uphill battle i think... because i am so, SO different... but i think thats one of the reasons God placed me in this particular family, He knew i would at least try...

MY HUBBY ROCKS... a day late.

Well, last night justin and i decided to take nathaniel out on a date! we had 2 Olive Garden gift cards, so went there... we had to wait for a seat for about 45 min, then once we got our seat nathaniel started getting fussy. i just don't think he liked sitting in his carrier... i think we're gonna have to start just carrying him, and letting him sit in a high chair thing. But so i took him and changed him, but we was still left unsatisfied... Justin inhaled his food, then once he was done, he took on the job of entertaining Nathaniel so that i could sit and enjoy my meal... he played with him, tried to show him how to color, went and mixed up some formula... i just thought it was SO SWEET of him to inhale his meal, so that i could enjoy mine.



another amazing thing he's done is this... i've been planning a trip home for the time period of while he would be out to sea. From the day after Thanksgiving to about the 13th. Well... the military changed their plans... and totally flip flopped the time he would be gone and the time i would be home. ugh! so my parents offered to pay for the change... and i was torn, because my Aunt had already planned to wait til i arrived to have our family Thanksgiving, and i also really wanted to take Nathaniel to the Osky Lighted Christmas parade... but i wanted to extend because otherwise i'd be home alone, but also i wanted to be home for my grandpa's birthday, and my best friend who now lives in Tennessee would be flying home on the 13th! ugh! SO... justin encourages me to just extend the trip, while keeping my arrival date. Thats a long trip! and that leaves him here alone for about a week and a 1/2. I was apprehensive about it... i felt bad for leaving him... but he was so sweet and just said, "i want you happy, and home makes you happy... if you have the chance to stay longer, you'll be happy longer"... LOL i told him that it's not like home is the only thing that makes me happy and that HE made me the happiest, but i understood what he was trying to say. :) He also said "I want everyone to see Nathaniel and how awesome he is! Go and enjoy!"... I think he's also wanting a little bit of time to just himself before he has to go live with 2300 other people and have NO privacy! :S but heck, I DON'T BLAME HIM!!! lol so i extended my stay at home. i'm pretty excited... :) and justin just makes me love him all the more when he's so selfless like that... you don't find that quality in men often. lol I love him so much. :)

My mom's not calling me back fast enough!

so i'll kinda vent here! so... justin was supposed to go out to sea from Nov. 30th to about Dec. 8th. So i planned a trip home, courtesy of my parents for Nov. 28th through Dec. 13th. Excited... was able to get decent tickets from Norfolk to DesMoines... and i was super glad i would have to be here while Justin was gone! i HATE that... i get nervous and really lonely and easily depressed. no fun at all. But then today... justin comes home and informs me that they've changed the entire schedule!!!!! so now i'll be home for most of the time that he's gone out to sea! GRRRRRRR!!!! clear to the 20th of December!!!!! so now i'm debating on whether we should change my dates... though it will cost extra. :( so i don't know... i wanted to stay longer in the first place because my grandpa's birthday is on Dec 18th, but i didn't want to lose out on days i could spend with my hubby... especially if i'll be moving home in March (STILL not totally sure, but moving forward planning that way).

this is just so typical of the military too... they never stick to anything they say... they push you and pull you this way and that... breaking their word, making excuses... i'm just so sick of the military. And living here, i feel like i'm not supposed to say that or feel that way... all the wives i talk to "love" the military... me? i hate it... i hate everything about it... except the health care and pay checks. :P

i just don't know what to do... i'm mad, but i have no one to be mad AT... it's not like i can march in there and shake my finger at some captain and tell him all about how he messed up my schedule! :P and it's not justin's fault at all... he just tells me what they tell him! Anyways... i'm mad, i don't know what to do about my plane tickets, and my mom needs to call me so i can figure out what i should do. :S

TV night...

Well, justin has been gone all day, and i've spent the entire night doing NOTHING. Justin had duty starting at 7am this morning, and will not be back home until tomorrow evening after work. ugh... hate these days/nights. i always freak myself out when bedtime comes around... i always think i hear something or see some shadow... eek. :S

I"m making a short trip home in late nov./early dec... justin is going out to sea for about 10 days, so i decided to fly home for about 2 weeks... but DON'T TELL ANYONE! We're making it a surprise for my grandparents. :) my grandpa will FREAK OUT when i walk in the day after Thanksgiving. :) i THINK i'm looking forward to it... i'm getting really worn out flying all the time though... i really wish that my family could come HERE... but i know it's just easier if i go there, more people can see me... bla bla bla. :P i'm just tired of packing up everything i need, and everything nathaniel needs... then hauling it all back and having it laying all over... i feel like i'm ALWAYS living out of a suitcase... whether i'm here, or there... and i hate running through the airport, and not having a car when i'm there, and worrying about justin maybe missing something... ugh! oh well... just part of the military-life, huh?

so... the election is upon us... i can't wait for it to be over! i'm not ashamed to say i've already voted for McCain... i went my MORALS, not my pocketbook. :) maybe i'll feel like listing all my reasons and asking for debate on Election Day... but not tonight... i'm feeling too lazy tonight... like every night mostly.

I have a whole list of things i SHOULD be doing. unloading the dishwasher, doing MORE dishes, folding the HUGE pile of clothes on my bedroom floor... but have i even TOUCHED those things???? NOOOOOOOOO!!!! ugh... i disgust myself... i don't know why i HATE doing those things so much... they are just so repetetive, and unappreciated. Justin doesn't notice... or at least he doesn't say anything if they are or are not done! he doesn't care! BUT... i need to kick my butt in gear and get to it... right Katy? :S so... in about 10 min. when my show is over, i'm gonna go pop some popcorn, get a movie, and go back to my bedroom and get to work. :P

... maybe. :P