ran across a blog... this young lady of 18 was talking about the touchy subject of female submission in the church and in the home. And i realized, as i read her blog... that it IS a touchy subject! i found myself wanting to correct, educate, and defend a more... "relaxed" version of that same "rule". See, i believe that women shouldn't be HEAD pastors... but i firmly believe that when talking about YOUTH pastors, or leaders working closely with CHILDREN, women should undoubtedly be involved... as a partner, or main leader for smaller children for sure. I DO NOT want a female president for this country... God made men to lead in a way women cannot. period.
but in a marriage, where the man and woman are SO close, and SO intimate... the lines become muddy, and complicated. See, Justin and i may have it backwards... but right for us. I'm the more spiritually mature... i was brought up in the church, accepted Christ at 3, then rededicated at about 15, i've had my valleys, and my mountain tops, i talk with God everyday, and am active in the church. Justin was brought up in and out of the Catholic church, accepted Christ in 2005, leaned on God heavily through Navy bootcamp, but since then been complacent (being in the military makes a day-in-day-out LIVING faith, really hard! :( )... so in our home, i am the spiritual leader... but i pray for my husband's spiritual health, i pray fervantly for my husband to become a man of God and our home's leader. We discuss, and share our thoughts about things in the Bible, about God in our lives, and i see Justin growing... maybe not as drastically, or quickly as i'd like... but he is coming to understand the part that God wants to play in our everyday life! That is great to me!
Then i see a extreme of submission... where every penny is overseen, every plan is approved, outfits ok'ed... and... i get REALLY defensive and my inner feminist comes out. I mean, i ask justin if we can afford certain things... i try to make him feel included in all my plans, but in our situation, i can't run my daily schedule by him hardly at all. I tell him after the fact!... i don't dress slutty, i ask if he likes what i'm wearing, but come on, i'm not a doll, and i need clothes, man! i'm not waiting around for you to feel generous to just give me the privaledge of buying new underwear! my gosh. lol And then... i see husbands being demanding, pouty, unappreciative, and whiney! UGH! if you're gonna submit to a man... submit to a MAN... not a little boy who stomps his feet and blows you off when you break your back trying to be exactly what he wants! Pretty sure Jesus wouldn't do that.
I don't know... i've had this brewing. I see sweet girlfriends, striving to be Godly wives... then all they get is a pat on the head as hubby walks by. >:( grrrrrrr... i mean, marriage is a partnership, a team effort, a mutual love and respect. Your husband is meant to be adored, as well as respected... but isn't respect earned to some extent????? A wife is meant to be cherished and nutured. And encouragement, consideration, fairness, faithfulness, honesty, and patience is naturally meant to be given to both!!!! IT'S A TWO WAY STREET!
i love the way my husband and i work... he is faithful, encouraging, strong, wise... i adore him and respect him beyond words. But i also know that he trusts me to make good descisions too... that he trusts that i have a brain, that i have good, spirit-led, judgement... that he loves me, respects me as a woman, and wants to make me happy. I adore him, and respect him... but he doesn't have to stomp around pouting to get it, or demanding it... he is a GOOD husband, and earns my trust, my adoration, and my respenct. and i strive to serve him... and let him know what an amazing man i think he is. I want him to know that i think he's SO smart financially... so i run all our spending by him, but not cuz he'll stomp around if i DON'T... because i feel better if i do.
i don't know... maybe i'm just a silly, nieve, only-2-years-into-marriage, honeymooner... but i love God, a lot, and i feel like God is blessing the way we're going... and i get defensive. lol SO... thats my blog.
this ends my rant.